Feel free to speak Korean
She said.
I’ve studied English for quite a while, willingly or not, so understanding it isn’t too hard. But speaking it as beautifully as my native language? That’s where I often fall short. That day was no different. When I mentioned that I could have been more persuasive in Korean, she made the suggestion above.
‘You can use Korean. But I’m going to stick to English.’
Since we started chatting in English from the get-go, I never thought she’d understand Korean. Classic case of overgeneralization based on stereotypes.
‘Why did you think I couldn’t understand Korean?’
It’s not common to see someone whose first language is English – though she moved to the States when she was young, so technically it wasn’t her first language – speak Korean fluently. Sure, there are many Koreans who are great at English, but it’s different. Can’t explain it logically… So, I asked again if it’s okay to speak Korean.
‘Of course. Go ahead, try to persuade me in Korean.’
I usually get compliments for being a good speaker. I started unraveling my structured thoughts in Korean. Yet, strangely, out came sentences that weren’t much more advanced than when I spoke English, like an elementary school student.
‘There’s not much difference from before, huh? Maybe you’re just not good at talking.’
It felt unfair. As I was getting flustered, a past memory flashed before my eyes. Long ago, I had to give a presentation to about twenty people, two of whom were foreigners. We had an interpreter, so I presented with consecutive interpretation. Even though I knew the topic inside out, I stammered just like now, thinking, ‘Why am I doing this?’ It felt like having a post-stroke moment… And here I was, having the same thoughts. Why?
‘I think I know why.’
I had no clue.
‘It’s the switch in your brain. You probably think in Korean when you speak. But when you listen to me, you have to switch back to English. You can’t toggle that mode switch in your head smoothly. Look, I’m in the same situation, but I’m doing just fine.’
She was right. Her English was flawless. Anyway, the topic shifted, and the talk about ‘awkward Korean’ ended there. But on my way home, I couldn’t shake the feeling that there was another reason. If it were just about the switch, it should be a problem when speaking Korean and listening to English, but that wasn’t usually the case. Plus, in past situations, I didn’t even need to toggle the switch. There was an interpreter, so I only needed to communicate in Korean. Even then, I wasn’t natural.
Eventually, I found the common thread: ‘consideration.’ When I gave past presentations, I aimed to use sentences easy to interpret, avoiding rhetorical devices and sticking to simple sentences. Naturally, the speech ended up plain and dull. The same happened today. Though there was no interpreter, I didn’t know her Korean level, so I used simple sentences that even a beginner could understand. Being too considerate, I guess.
The taxi was warm, making me drowsy. I was too tired to think logically, and since I concluded that it was because of my considerate nature, further contemplation felt pointless.
The result of all this thinking isn’t going to change my English-speaking skills.
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